Robbie Williams looked just as bemused during his ITV interview before performing at the World Cup as no doubt millions of people were watching the performance. As pretty as some of the staging next surrounding the singer was, this was not the strangeness on a grand scale you expect from a opening ceremony. Instead, we got a very pretty concert with Williams running through a selection of his best known songs (Let Me Entertain you striking a predictable opening note). I can't say much bad about this ten minute spectacle. It was just something that happened. It wasn't really an opening ceremony just something to distract the viewer for a few minutes. For bad or for worse an opening ceremony should be inched in the memory for days to come. As it turned out Williams by mistake has provided this most bizarre of World Cups with its second big headline (the first being the Spanish coach's departure). His two fingered salute it has be suggested is against the law in Russia, leading to rumours that he may face criminal action. Start the conspiracy theories now folks!
Meanwhile, viewers in the UK were treated to a painful hour of build-up before the brief opening ceremony, with ITV's normal waffle. To be fair, the pundits were on solid form, with even Ian Wright not coming off as a total shambles for a change. Slaven Bilic seemed mad at the world. His style of repeating mostly the same thing over again, just with a different phase, with a some ranting and proper insights thrown in will either sink or swim over the tournament. He will be the most lovable pundit in four weeks time or the most despised. Normally a solid host here Mark Pougatch has to struck down by the ITV curse turning him into the dullest man in the room. On the positive front former Women's International made Eniola Aluko made a confident start to ITV broadcasting career. As is normally the case with the ITV converge it settled down to no distinct rhythm. There was no great depth or insight, no flow, and patchy attempts at humour. I got the impression that the channel plan on tackling this World Cup with the same cliches it uses for other tournaments, and that there would be little journalistic engagement with the politics surrounding it. The low point of the afternoon was their lengthy discussion on VAR. Personally I'm already bored of the subject and listening to this lot (including extra insight from Mark Clattenberg) try to explain the system and pick apart its merits was truly painful. A thoughtful profile on Reheem Starling's painful up bringing and rise to fame once again suggested the channel would spend a large amount of the tournament banging on about England, even on days when the national side are not playing. At the end of its first hour it felt like ITV had barely scratched the surface of what could be ahead at this World Cup.
So to the opening match which for me was quite forgettable, if lively in places. Strange to describe a 5-0 win for the hosts as such. The quality of she five goals cannot be questioned with the fourth standing out as a world class effort. But following a fast paced opening, an early Russian goal actually proved a death nail for match quality. Having gotten the break the hosts settled down into an effective counter attacking game with limp resistance from the Saudi Arabia. This pattern could have led to a more thrilling match if it wasn't for the fact that the visitor's standard of passing was almost of a Sunday league level. They offered pretty much zero going forward, and there wasn't a great deal of passion on or off the pitch. Anyway, there have been worse opening games, and to get five goals is always a rare treat. For the hosts this could be as good as their world cup gets, and possible a key result if there are to make it to the first knockout round. I expect both Uruguay and Egypt to offer far greater resistance. Meanwhile, Saudi Arabia competing at their first tournament in two decades announced themselves as the team to beat, and beat and beat again... If there are a worst team this year I will be very surprised.
Star of the Day: Denis Cheryshev (Russian midfielder who scored twice from the bench of second of which was a wonderful volley).
Dork of the Day: Glenn Hoddle (he may know a thing or two about football, but his lifeless and repetitive commentary style is likely to have fans crying for Andy Townsend to return to the booth...
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